ireland

DAY 1
so we get to Dublin at about 1 and it was kinda nice out. we expected cold and rainy but it wasnt too bad. we head to our hotel in a cab, who was sitting in drivers seat on the right, and we drove to the hotel on the left side of the road. it was a little mind trip. anyways this guy has the stereotypical irish accent. he spoke english, but we had no fuckin idea what he was sayin. anyways he was really friendly and told us a joke. i dont remember the specifics but heres the main plot. this guy and his buddy are in a pub and the guys says to his friend: if i have a kid with your wife, would that make us related? and the other guy says...no it would make us even. but the way our cabbie delivered it was perfect and hilarious so he told us another joke. it was about viagra and boners. 20 euros later we were at our hotel. nice little place outside the city with a bus stop outside. we take the bus into the city, a double decker and we obviously sat on the top, and got off at the main street area. we had BK. walked around. had some pints. the picture above is from a place called o'neills, nice place. we headed back early because we were tired and saw most of the city in about 8 hours because its kinda small. so we head back, only to find a gem on the TV. Biker Mice From Mars and Arrested Development. awesome.

DAY 2:
We took a bus to cork to stay for free with Anna O'Brien in cork. We get there at around 6, get some beers and some food, eat the food, drank the beers and went to some pubs. Sly and I expected to stay out late, but the pubs close at 2 at the latest so we drank a couple, chatted and went back.

DAY 3
It was time to be tourists. Sly and I were informed that Blarney castle was close by so we took a bus there during the day. it was a nice day out we walked around a lot. if you think irish country side and small town, this is it. the blarney stone is located at the top of the castle and it is believed that if you kiss it, you get good luck. sly and i kissed it. you have to lay down and kiss it upside down because of the location of the rock. we also heard that the locals piss on it and laugh because tons of tourists come and kiss it, whatever urine is sterile, and i like the taste. there was more than just the castle tho, it was like a farm area. there was a huge horse field with this strange wooden structure that resembled a bar, so sly and i took some pics of us at the bar hoping the horses would come and serve us. the horses never came. what else, i dont know thats about it for blarney but it was a good time. at night we went to some more pubs and drank. good times.


DAY 4:
Jameson factory. We had one more day left of touring around the land so anna tells us that the jameson distillery is near by. why the fuck not? lets do it. so we go to the jameson factory by bus and take the tour. it was a really old looking place with lots of booze and interesting history. there were only 8 of us on the tour, 3 spanish guys in their late 20's, 2 old people from Nebraska, and the 3 of us. our tour guide might i add was bangin and i think she was from the midwest. what she was doin in ireland giving tours at a factory was beyond me, but it was a nice touch to let us stare at her ass while she walked in front of us. after the tour we got some whiskey, and it was delicious. and free. we got some souvies and parted ways. but not before we encountered the most ridiculously priced bottle i had ever seen. 5000 euros for a bottle of whiskey, which is now like $8000. it didnt look too special to me. but i know shit about booze. anyway the picture is the bottle. we got back, had some dinner, drank and went out to some pubs. finally, we found a place where everyone there was retardedly drunk. just what we needed. kids our age spillin pints, singing songs and roughin each other up. nice. the final song they sang was "what awonderful world" and some skinny white kid did the raspy black man voice. it was awesome. we left when it closed and made the trek back to anna's place.

DAY 5:
We traveled from cork to dublin and then got to the airport by about 930. what a fuckin day.

DAY 6:
our flight was at 745 am, and we had been at the airport since 930 pm the night before so we had to find a way to kill some time. we set up shop, watched a soccer game, ate some food, played battleship on slys phone. then we got bored. at the mickey d's there was a dollar menu, but we only had 74 cents. lets look for some change what the fuck else we got to do. of course at the first vending machine i got 60 cents. so now we had 1.34 and a mcchicken was 2. lets keep looking. we swept 4 floors of the airport looking for change, but we only had around 1.70 at the end of our romp. and this is what being homeless is like. so we go to mcdonalds only to find them closed. luckily they were just closing and we sweet talked the ugly bitches working there and they gave us some nasty ass fries. sleep time. we huddle in this area where we can put two chairs together and sly goes into the starbucks area. 10 minutes go by, he gets kicked out, wakes me up and he says he's gonna try another place. mcdonalds...30 mins later her gets kicked out again. comes back to where i was and i gave him one of my chairs and we sleep. 1 hour later we all get kicked out. then we move to another place after considering sleeping on the floor, back to mcdonalds. we both find good spots and log 2 hours. sleeping in the airport is weird. you sleep with all your shit at least touching you and its like sleeping with your lights on at high intensity. and evertime you hear a noise, paranoia sets in and you have to see if someone is trying to gank your shit. finally i fall asleep and the next thing i knew some woman tugged on my arm to wake me because mcdonalds was packed with customers and i had no idea what the hell was goin on. it was around 545 now. we get our boarding passes and peace out. see ya ireland.